Happy New Year!!! O.k. I'm back....

I bet you guys thought I fell off the face of the earth by now. I didn't, but what a ride it has been.
So, I left the job at the shelter, as they wouldn't let me get involved at all except to cook all day.  I went in to the directors office and told her exaclty how I felt and she offered me a job there.  I said no and left that day. 
I then went on to enjoy the rest of the summer at the lovenest and had the grandkids up.  We had a ball at the beach together.  I realized how much I'm really hating it being so far away from them and missing so much of their growing up.
You know, I'm not one of those 'kid people'; I just don't like little kids that much, but my grandkids totally have my heart and I really love spending time with them.  Even after a week of a messy and noisy house, I still don't want them to go.
So, at the end of the summer we had to make a discision as to where we wanted to live.  We ended up back in Toronto, not far from NAi Hubby's mother.  Which was handy.  We were able to have her over all the time for dinner and now that Holly was driving, she would take her shopping and she loved having a 'grand daughter' as much as Holly liked having a grandmother.  Mom spoiled Holly silly and even paid her tuition into pastoral college.  I was floored.  That was so generous of her.  Anyway, Holly was definately her favourite person on the planet.
So, Ashley, Rob and the kidlets came down for the Chistmas holidays and Holly went back with them to spend some time with her sister.  She ended up staying there for nearly all of January and kept phoning and saying that she wished that we would move back to our old area to be near Ashley and the kids.  I didn't think Holly would ever want to go back there again.  I was telling NAI Hubby this and he suddenly said, 'O.k., let's move there.'  I was stunned.  I would never want to live in this scuzzy little town again but the area is gorgeous and I actually missed it.
So, Holly and Ashley were thrilled that we would live close together finally, as that's what we had planned all along, but Rob is a small town boy and Toronto just wasn't for him.(and I didn't blame him!)  So, Holly came back home to help pack and I went out to Ashley's house to look for a place to live.  I was there for about two weeks when Hubby called and said that they had to take his mother into the hospital with stomach pain.  I was quite worried, but not overly as she was a pretty healthy 72 year old woman.  She was still living in her own house and was very indepenent.
The next day Hubby called to say that her bowels were leaking and she was toxic and they would need to go in and repair the leak.  I knew then it was very serious.  I told Hubby I should come home and he said not to because the Dr.'s felt they could fix it.
After the operation, she had one good day then one bad, and it went on that way for a few days.  She began to have respiratory distress and very quickly things went downhill from there.  My poor Hubby called me in hysterics last monday pleading for me to get home a.s.a.p.  I have never heard Hubby like that before and it really freaked me out.  I felt desperately helpless.  I grabbed my insulin, a few meds and Ashley and I hit the road.  I was so afraid I would not get there in time.  And I really didn't want my Hubby to have to go through this alone.  Plus, I wanted to see this precious lady one more time.  She was so good to me.  I just felt sick when we started on our journey home.
Ashley doesn't have her full liscence yet, so she is not allowed to drive on major hiways, so we had to take a slower secondary highway from just outside Ottawa to Toronto.  On a regular highway, it would take about 5 hours.  It was all good going up until Kingston, the halfway point.  We suddenly were hit by a blizzard so bad, we had to drive at a crawl.  Ashley is a good driver, so neither of us was worried, but we knew this was going to be a very looooong drive home.  I was praying for two things, 1- We would get there safely and 2- We would get there in time. 
Then it got dark and Ashley was having a terrible time seeing.  She couldn't tell what part of the road was the part we should be driving on.  It was not busy, but there were still some cars coming towards us on the other side.  I could tell Ashley was a bit nervous.  And with my eyes, I could barely see Ashley, never mind the road.  There were two cars coming towards us and Ashley turned the wheel just slightly to make sure we were on our own side when we suddenly spun out in front of the two oncoming cars.  And just as suddenly, the car spins around and we end up in the ditch on our side of the street, with our front tires totally in the ditch.  We were missed by just a hair by these two cars.  When we finally came to a stop. Ashley was completely unhinged.  She was shaking so badly I thought she was going to have a nervous breakdown.  Nof one of those two cars stopped to see if we were alright; they just kept on driving.  Great, out in the middle of nowhere, blizzard conditions, no clue where we even were, and my kid's falling apart beside me.  Hmmm, what to do.  Finally I asked Ashley if the car was a front wheel drive.  She was still in a panic and said she couldn't remember.  Finally, a guy that was behind us stopped and came over to the car.  I asked him if he knew if our car was a front wheel drive and he said yes.  I asked him where we were and he mentioned a Native Reserve.  He said he'd go back to his car and call for help.  I'm thinking tow trucks and hassles etc. so I told Ashley to just floor it and we'd get out of there.  She did and voila, we were out.  What really had her shaken up was that she's afraid of the airbags in the car.  She is a very tiny girl and has to sit pretty close to the wheel to reach the pedals.  She has heard so many stories about the airbags going off on small people and really injuring them.
O.K. Back on the road....30 K/H....sometimes 20 K/H...poor Ashley, and the weather was getting worse with every kilometer.  And she was very freaked out because she had barely touched the wheel and wasn't even near the break and we spun so bad.  It freightened her that it could happen again at any time for no reason.
So, we're crawling and up ahead we see a bunch of cop cars etc. and there was an officer standing in the middle of the road stopping cars.  We thought it might be a R.I.D.E. program so we stopped and the officer said there was a huge accident just ahead and we'd have to take the major highway past the accident.  So we turned around and Ashley is freaking because she isn't even liscenced for the big highway.  But we have no choice.  I tell her she'll do fine, just go slower and just make it to the very first cut-off which shouldn't be too far away.  It sounded good in theory but I didn't think of one thing.  The trucks!!  They were zooming by at well past the speed limit and it was blowing us (at 30k/h on a 100k/h road) Everytime a truck or any other vehicle could be seen in her rearview mirror, Ashley would immediately pull over until the coast was clear.  Sometimes it was every 20 feet.  Then she'd pull over and cry.  She was so scared.  It took us nearly an hour to get to the next cut-off.  And the weather was just getting worse.  I felt terrible I had got Ashley into this mess.  She was a wreck.
We finally got to a gas station in the middle of nowhere and called home.  Poor Hubby was worried sick.  He had even called Ashley's house just after we left to say don't leave, there's a storm coming.  So, I promised to phone every two hours or so.  Altogether, it took us 16 hours to do a five hour drive.  We then went straight to the hospital.
Mom was in a private room and she was asleep most of the time, as they had her on a morphine drip.  She seemed happy to see me and I told her I loved her.
Very long story, just a little shorter....Mom died on Saturday.  I was the only one there when she took her last breath.  God Rest her soul...
The memorial will be on this coming Saturday. And I have no underwear...
So, we are staying in her house right now until everything is done and then we are gone for good.  Hoooray!!!  I really hate the city and will be glad to see the back of it.
Well, I'm exhausted and have a cold, the second one this new year!?  So I'll write after the memorial on Saturday.
Again, forgive my lengthy absence.  I'll try to do better.  Lots of new things up ahead for us, so I'll keep you posted.
Forsythia, thank you for your patience with me.  I hope you're good.

Merry Christmas and Pass the Vodka...

Well, it's that time again people. Christmas cheer, family, birds 'banging', me falling...oh wait...that's just a Friday for me, I forgot.
I hope you are all readier for Christmas than I am!! Nope, not in the least bit ready...sigh. And we're getting the tree today....where did I put those decorations??? I believe they're under a my small mountain of small kitchen appliances in the storage closet. You know, the one that's so crammed full of junk you can't close the door anymore...sigh.
Holly had her surgery on Tuesday. She's doing very well, but has a mouthful of cankers that are causing her more pain than her teeth. Poor Holly! But she has found some solice in swigging vodka every once in awhile. Either it helps the pain or she just doesn't care anymore!! Merry Christmas Holly!
Well, some good news. Ashley, Rob and the grandbabies came on Monday. The kids are getting so big! and so are the grandbabies..lol. I love having them here; I just want to keep them forever..all of them. Somehow, we'll pull this mess together and make a beautiful Christmas of it because I have all the main elements for the best Christmas ever. I have my loving family here all together for the first time in a long time and that's all the Christmas I need.
So, now for 'Adventures in Toryland'. Ashley, Ariel and I go for a simple trip of grocery shopping yesterday, but it was snowing like blazes. We took our bundle buggy with us and when we came back we got stuck with the buggy in the deep snow. Ashley and I are pulling and pulling until I (of course) fell down. That was it. I could not get up no matter how we tried. I was about ready to get out my blackberry to phone Rob to come and get me, as everytime Ashley tried to help me, I would fall again and spin. We look up, and there's a man shoveling snow. Ashley asked him to help us and he came over and helped me up and even pulled our cart for us into the building. It was then I realized it was my next door neighbour! Embarrassing! Ashley couldn't stop laughing long enough to be of any help to me at all...the rotten kid. She's just like her sister...sigh.
Anyway, school is going great and keeping me busy. Homework and more homework, but I'm enjoying it.
Just in case I don't write again before Christmas, may I extend God's Richest Blessings to you all from my family to yours.
Take care

Heaven..I'm In Heaven...

Well, peeps, I am in 'Nanny Heaven' right now. I have Ashley, Rob and my three special grandchildren with me for the week. I am loving every moment of it. My baby Scarlett has grown into a little sweetheart, and Ariel and Stephon are getting big as well. I wish I could keep them forever. But no, their mother is selfish and won't give them to me. I just want to borrow them until they're 20 or so...what's the problem. I wish they lived closer...I want to be with them so much more than this. However, It does tend to make this time sweeter and maybe I wouldn't appreciate them as much if they were around all the time. Good news is...once Ashley is finished school, they will be moving back around here and I will never take my grandchildren for granted...ever! I don't want to even think about the time for them to go home...I'm going to just enjoy the moment.
That's why I haven't been doing much on my site lately..however, there will be new pictures coming soon on the photo/video blog, of course of my wonderful, beautiful family.
I hope you all have the best week, like I am.
Take care
Tory

A Blah Kind of Day...

Gee, it's just one of those days when I feel like bitching. I think I'm getting the winter blues. The days always seem so dim and dark outside, especially when it's not snowing. I love the snow and it perks me up, but to just have dark clouds all the time...well it's just not working for me. At least not today.

Poor Ashley..she's going through hell right now. Everyone in the house has chicken pox, including herself and Scarlett. It started with Ariel, who probably caught it in school, then Rob and Baby Boy got it. They are in pretty rough shape right now. Yesterday, Ashley noticed a few dots on Scarlett, but nothing very noticeable. Then, Ariel and Ashley got bad colds. Ashley got an ear-ache and a sore throat. Ariel has a terrible cough. So, Ashley called me this morning and said that Ariel had coughed so much during the night, she woke Ashley up at about 3 a.m. and had vomited in her bed. So, Ashley goes to clean it up and notices that Ariel had broken blood vessels in her eyes and on her face from coughing and vomiting. Tonight, Ashley gave me a call...Ariel was complaining that her eyes hurt. She asked me if she should take her to the hospital to get it checked out. I thought she should, because chicken pox can get into your eyes and make you blind. I told her to call me back when she got home. Ariel called me and told me she has pink eye. In both eyes!! Arrrrgggg! Of all things! Poor Ashley! She was at the hospital for only 3 hours, but when she got home, Scarlett had cried the whole time she was gone and was completely covered in chicken pox. What a terrible day for her! And the next few days will be a challenge trying to make sure Ariel doesn't spread her pink eye around. She will probably have to take Scarlett to the Dr. because I don't know how chicken pox effects young babies. Poor Ashley!

I worry about Ashley and the kids. She could use some extra help right now, and I wish she lived closer. I could take the baby or Ariel or even just go over and help her during the day, doing what-ever. Rob is so sick right now, he's having a hard time being any help. Anyway, I instructed her to keep at Ariel to wash her hands and only use her own towel etc. Maybe it will help to keep it from spreading. I hope so. Poor Baby Boy has his chicken pox so bad and especially around his genitals. Prayers and good thoughts for them.

In other news, have you heard all the hype about Tom Cruise and Scientology. In case you don't know, scientologist's believe that we are originally from aliens and they are waiting for the mother ship to return. It's a very odd 'religion'. They believe that we simply have lost the memory of our origins, but the 'church' can help you to remember. They also believe that there are actual aliens already in the American government who are getting ready to take over and enlighten the rest of us...or something along those lines. O.k...what?? I can't believe they actually manage to take seemingly intelligent and normal people, successful people, and convince them of all this. It seems to me to be a slow brainwashing technique or something. And by the time you find out you're an alien, you are already heavily invested in it.

And you guys thought I was an oddball! Even I wouldn't fall for that!...I..don't...think. Well, if I did, I certainly wouldn't tell anyone!!

Anyway, Poppy is still sitting on her eggs. Nothing hatched yet. Is she ever mean to Bailey sometimes. We have to keep an eye on her, she is like a woman in labour. Moody, cranky, mean and just miserable. Actually, she's always been that way...to be honest. She really is not a nice little Poppy, but we love her anyway. She has such a cute and innocent face as she plans every one's death...sigh.

I bribed Holly into cleaning the house for me. Hoooray!! I just don't have the energy to do it myself these days, but I can't stand the mess anymore. In February, I go to a rhumatologist to find out if I have fybromyalgia or chronic fatigue syndrome. I am exhausted all day long and in so much pain all over my body. I sleep quite a bit and so I haven't been able to work for the last year. However, I may have found a place for on-line jobs for people with disabilities. That would be good to be bringing in some money to help out the new and improved Hubby. But, he never complains about anything with me and is so good to me, I wonder about him sometimes???!

Hubby just saw this and said for me to stop wondering....o.k...

Well, I feel much better now that I've written all my crap down and whined about it until you guys probably thought you wanted Poppy to actually kill me in my sleep! Thanks for listening, guys!

Take care Kids

Tory

By the way, does anyone know where Tunisia is??

A Blast From the Past!

First, I will henceforth be writing any further blogs in bold, as it makes it easier for me to see...and I just discovered the button...duh.
Well, I had an interesting day. Ashley called, and as some of you may know, she is taking the Social Worker Program at college. She is actually in her last semester. She is my personal hero, as she does school with tons of homework, takes care of 3 kids under 5 years old, and is a real go getter. And to his credit, her hubby, Rob, is a terrific father and watches the kids while she's at school, working around her hours as much as possible. They are very plugged in to their kids. Did I mention that Ariel has started school? She absolutely loves it and the kids and teachers love her back. She's a big girl now, and is saving all her pictures she paints at school for nanny to frame. I'm telling you, she's brilliant!!
Anyway, I often help Ashley out a bit with her homework. Today I wrote an essay on post-traumatic stress disorder for her, and e-mailed it to her. She needed a patients perspective on it for her big project and I fit the bill. (Come on, you guys knew I was a freak when you met me...!)
I went into my e-mails and found a note from an old friend, which really made my day. We go back a long way, Bambi and I. (Of course Bambi isn't her real name...do I look like Walt Disney to you?? Actually, in profile I do, mustache and all...sigh!) We've been through a great deal together, including my divorce from Fang and me meeting my new and improved hubby. We lost touch a few years ago. I didn't realize how much I'd missed her until I saw her e-mail. So, I grabbed the phone and gave her a call...it was like we never paused...just picked up where we left off, more or less. She's as crazy as I am, and we have spent a lot of time together laughing when we should have been crying and crying when we probably should have been laughing. We really truly 'get' each other and that means a lot. Both our lives have changed a lot since we last spoke and we have a lot of catching up to do. Hubby and I will go visit her on Sunday. That will be fun.
Did I mention to you all that Hubby quit smoking on New Year's Eve? He's doing great! I'm so proud of him.
That's all for now, kids.
Take care
Tory

A Thanksgiving Disappointment....

Well, the bad news is that Ashley called on Monday and said they were having transmission trouble and couldn't come down. Hubby was very disappointed as he has not seen Scarlett yet. Sigh... I miss all my babies, including the adult ones.
On top of that, It has been extremely hot in our apartment because of the warm fall we're having. Far too hot to cook a turkey, so we are having pizza for our Thanksgiving dinner. Sigh...
Just one of those weeks, where you'd like to just stay in bed and eat bon-bons, er..if I had bon-bons...but I don't...sigh...
To top it off, I have a hole in my ankle about the size of a dime that's been there for about 3 months, which is a bummer for a diabetic. Used the cream the Dr. gave me, but nothings helping it. It's getting bigger...sigh...Well, if I end up having to get my leg cut off, I will get a hollow prosthesis so I don't have to carry a purse anymore. I could fill it with everything I would need for an outing (like Vodka!) and I would decorate it with..I don't know...stickers? Maybe fly tape..or how about lovely wallpaper? Ooh, I know, pictures of my grandchildren!!! Let me know if you guys have any suggestions.
OMG, hubby has put on an Elvis movie...sigh. Could the week get any worse?
Hope your week has been better, friends.
Take care
Tory

We've Arrived!!

We're here and have found my daughter well and still pregnant. Thank goodness we didn't miss the event. We have been enjoying our time together and we're having a grand time with the kids.
We had a great train ride up. Bought a coffee and spilled it all down my new white shirt, of course. Holly says it's like traveling with a 2 year old.
I'll keep you all posted, pardon the pun!!
Take care all.