Elvis Has Left the Building

Today, boys and girls, we will be talking about haircuts. I have always had long flowing hair. And I mean always...at least since I have been an adult. You see, I have a head shaped like a huge basketball and I find that with short hair I look a lot like the basketball Tom Hanks had as his best friend in the movie 'Castaway'. I could have been it's body double. But alas, a few years ago I noticed that my hair was thinning. So much so that I had to get it all cropped off to try and disguise the fact that I looked a little like Telly Savalas.
I have nothing against short hair in general. A lot of women look so cute in their pixie cuts. As for me....I hate it. I doesn't matter how often I get it done, or even where I get it done, it's always awful. Sometimes there's that moment of hope, somewhere between getting it trimmed and it being almost dry, where I think, ooh, maybe this one isn't so bad. Until 'it' happens. The stylist takes out the hair blower and the gel. 'Here it comes', I think. 'My journey into 'hair hell.' And I'm never disappointed! I always leave the salon looking like Elvis. (and I'm talking the latter years, not the handsome early years!)
I knew I was in trouble when, one day I was leaving the salon and some woman yelled out, 'OMG, I always knew you were still alive,' and asked me for my autograph!'
It's kind of depressing, since it happens every time I get a trim. So, I've officially given up any hope for a nice 'do.'
However, I am starting to think of getting a wig, or extensions. Even dreds would be better than this!
But until then, I guess I will just have to practice my 'autograph'.